This week, actor Elliot Page, who is most well known for his role in the Netflix series Umbrella Academy, came out as transgender. He announced his new name and pronouns in a heartfelt post, citing heartfelt gratitude to the incredible people who have supported him along the journey. Around the internet, there was a sense of overwhelming positivity directed towards Elliot, with comments from organizations, fans, and just about everyone radiating warmth and care. The support witnessed was impeccable, but as always when someone comes out, there was confusion about how to address the situation. When can I call them their former name? What do I do about the films they were in as their former name? What pronouns do I use? All of these questions will be answered on today’s segment of Esmée’s Take, where we will discuss how to address these topics, why you should care, and ways you can show your support.
Their name is Elliot now? Can I ever call them their former name?
Once a transgender person decides on a new name, it is improper to reference their former name, even if you are referring to instances that happened while they used their former name. Calling a transgender person by their former name (or deadnaming) can cause negative effects to the person’s mental health. Even if you are referencing times when Elliot went by his former name, you should still use his preferred name. Elliot is Elliot now, so there is no need to call them by anything else.
What pronouns do I use?
Elliot has decided to use he/him and they/them pronouns. This means he is comfortable with either pronoun set. The same rules about calling someone their preferred name apply to this as well. It is proper to refer to Elliot using these pronouns, even if you are referring to a past instance when they went by another pronoun set. For more information about pronouns, you can check out my article about pronoun day, or go to the website mypronouns.org and look at they/them pronouns.
Why should I care about this?
Let’s pretend someone you love came out as transgender and asked to be referred to as a different name and asks to use different pronouns. Would this world be the one you want them to live in? Showing you care and are an understanding, accepting person gives people confidence to be themselves, as well as improves their anxiety and mental health. You should care because the people you love could come out, and your support is critical in their journey. You don’t just need to be supportive when a loved one comes out, you could support anyone you see transitioning. Who knows, you may make someone’s day. Elliot Page is a name everyone knows about, he is very well respected in the acting community and a fan favorite. While Elliot has a support network of loving fans, most trans people are not as fortunate, and their small networks dwindle after they come out. Which brings us to our next section about how to show support.
How can I show support?
One of the best ways to show support is listening. Providing support through listening is something anyone can do, and it is crucial to allow those who want someone to listen to come to you for listening. Another way you can help is giving space to those who want it. Being a good ally involves listening, support, but most importantly it involves knowing the basics. Read a book about being transgender, research pronouns on a website, find a podcast about trans experiences, support transgender friendly legislation, donate to LGBTQ+ events, learn about intersectionality and how black trans women are targeted more than ever now.
So… What’s the point?
It is vital to show everyone acceptance and care for coming out, and celebrities are no exception. Support improves mental health and overall confidence. Elliot is one of the most high profile cases of coming out in recent memory, and knowing how to address him and support him is a vital step in this process. Your love and acceptance is vital, and needed more than ever right now, for him and for others going through similar situations.